When people talk about the women’s movement and feminism, my take is that it is really about choice: real, legitimate, free choice. Free because your choice is not about your gender but rather about how you want to live your life.
We’ve all seen people make hard choices. They make their choices and then live with them. Yet, there is always some bit of residual guilt, as if their choice wasn’t really what they should do.
People who go back to work immediately after having children have to deal with a certain amount of flack and disapproval – often more from their friends and family then the people who don’t like them. Some people have a bit of guilt about not having any children because of the enculturation of how it ‘ought to be.’ It’s extremely difficult to get rid of the ‘oughts’ of society.
Genuine liberation would be reflecting on your own unique personality your own specific needs, and the situation you are in and then making the best possible choice that you can at the time. And it would be without a lot of consideration of what you ought to be doing by virtue of being female, or a certain age, or whatever category holds the ‘oughts’ for you.
Choice – it’s what’s best for you. If you are thrilled with your choice, (to work, to have children, to be child-free, to be single, to not take the promotion), why worry so much and care so much that other people aren’t choosing what you’ve chosen? Don’t other people have free choice too?
Free choice means to have your own lifestyle. To be successful at the things that you do really well and enjoy.